It’s Sunday. Why not spend some time with nature - maybe doing some weeding or change potting plants. It is very grounding to feel the earth in your hands or the grass under your bare feet. If you suffer from stress or have a high powered career where your mind is always “on†take this time to feel at one with the universe.
Tonight as you lie in bed, I want you to think about 3 positive things that happened today. However insignificant, however small. Close your eyes and smile at the good thoughts running around your head.
We have all accomplished something however small. I want you to take a few minutes to recall that moment. See your face and your excitement, hear what you heard and feel what you feel. Identify where you feel that good feeling. Make it bigger, brighter and full of colour. Enjoy!
You did it once now go out and accomplish something today.
Did you know that the ratio of depression in women to men is 2:1 and peaks in the age group of 25 - 44?
The reasons for this are varied;
Men hide it and are less likely to seek help;
Women in today’s society are multi-taskers and therefore more stressed than ever before;
Demands placed on women are higher e.g. must have career, husband and 2:4 children.
The last point is what I will dwell on in this post. My motivation for becoming a hypnotherapist was to provide a haven for women especially in the aforementioned age group. From a personal point of view and seeing my friends’ lives, we could have a career but yet it is an unwritten rule that we must also have a husband and children. In your early 20s you just assume you are going to be married in your 30s, it just happens, doesn’t it? But what if it doesn’t. What if you have a career but no partner or children? Where do you fit into in society. As you move into your late 30s/early 40s you become less socially acceptable. A la Brigid Jones you are surrounded by married smugs who constantly see you as a project to be fixed up. Do you find you are losing touch with married friends as your interests have changed. Do you feel guilty that you don’t feel guilty about being single and dare I say enjoying it. Or perhaps you are not enjoying it. You put your time into your career and by the time you came up for air, you were in your mid 30s.
So how can hypnosis help. You have various options. Do you wish to feel content with your life choices? Do you wish to find love? Hypnosis can help focus you on what you want. But you must be clear about what you want.
Or perhaps you have it all and are overwhelmed with being superwoman and finding time to get your nails manicured, make up perfect etc.
Or do you struggle to become pregnant and became totally down each month that your period arrives. You see babies and pregnancy bumps everywhere. When we are in this mind set the ovaries just contract (metaphorically speaking) and refuse to co-operate. That’s why we hear of couples going on trips around the world only to find they are pregnant when they changed scenery and focus.
I’ll leave that with you for today.
Britain’s Next Top Model started. Twelve tall slim attractive girls are in the show. As seen in other variations of the show, week by week the girls are transformed with their perceived weaknesses eliminated. We will watch while these girls cry about their hair being cut. Like Samson losing his strength when his hair was cut, the girls will feel like they have lost their femininity with having short hair. It’s just hair, it grows back. But yet these girls identify themselves through their hair. Others will struggle with their weight (there is one contestant who is a plus size girl - size 12!). No doubt this girl is tall so being a size 12 is hardly verging on obesity for her but she cried at the thought of having to parade around in her underwear because she has flabby thighs that the judges pointed out to her.
As a mother of 2 young girls, I hope to raise them to be confident (without being brassy), have self esteem, to trust their own inner advisors and not let them define themselves by their hair! I hope to instill in them that they can achieve whatever they want in life without the need to attack others who they perceive as a threat, and without the need to throw a tantrum when getting their hair cut (although I do make allowances on that point for my 2 year old!).
Like most of you I’m off on holidays. The last time I went away it was just me and my husband. Now, there are three young things in tow! So I will have to muster all my training to keep calm and in control.
Living in a positive mindset can be extremely tiring. Why? Because we are just not used to it! We are so used to living negatively, to focus on the negative that the effort of thinking positively can wear you out. But the pay offs are worth it.
I saw Jack Black (mindstorm) recently. It was a 2 hour event in Dublin. Believe it or not, I don’t know everything and what I learned from him are things that I incorporate to my practice. That’s what it’s all about, I’m learning and expanding my skills set so that you can benefit from it. The two main things I took away from that night were:
Breathing exercises:
Anyone who has attended me will know that I love my breathing exercises as it is a quick fix for an nervous/anxious moments that you may have. Jack Black’s take was an extension of what I was already doing:
That will definitely get you relaxed. Remember to keep the words “Calm and Relaxed†in your mind as you do it so that you bringing the feelings of being calm and relaxed into your body.
Don’t allow any negative thoughts to enter your mind.
As you sit into your car, see the parking space you want, know that you are going to get it and guess what, 95% of the time it will be there with the remaining 5% being times you have to wait just a few minutes. We do this one with the kids and they really enjoy guessing which one of them has picked the right place!
Do it also if you take public transport, see the bus coming and know that you are going to get a seat. I work a couple of days in Dublin and use the buses and do this.
If you are trying to sell your house. See your new house and feel yourself living there. Now see the person buying your home and enjoying living there. We must send out positive signs so that the universe is benefiting from our good feelings.
Let me know how you get on.
Do you grind your teeth at night? Do you grind/clench your teeth during the day? Teeth grinding as sufferers will be aware can cause tension headaches as well as discomfort in the jaw area with varying degrees. Why do you grind your teeth? At night-time our subconscious minds use the time to unravel and clear what is bothering us.Teeth grinding can be a subconscious call to find ways to relieve tension. How can hypnosis help? Hypnosis helps by helping you to relax your jaw. When playing your CD/MP3 at night-time your mind will follow the instructions to relax your jaw so that your jaw drops a little. An instruction might be in insert your tongue between your teeth - try this now - it is impossible to grind your teeth and you immediately know that your jaw is relaxed. With hypnosis you are relaxing all of your body muscle with the emphasis on your jaw muscles in this case as you will find that you will wake up feeling good having had a good night’s sleep. It is important to find a way to deal with your stress as this is the underlying problem that needs to be addressed and teeth grinding is a symptom, a very uncomfortable symptom of stress.
q Don’t tense up your body – drive in a relaxed manner;
q Change your view of other drivers;
q Stay relaxed and take a deep breath if another drive is behaving erratically;
q Don’t take their behaviour personally;
q Don’t make mental contact with the other drive – do not sign, acknowledge or look at them;
q Never get out of your car;
q Enjoy the time-out that heavy slow traffic brings, practice your breathing exercises;
q Remember cars are the best rolling universities – play a book or relaxing music and enjoy the “you†time;
q Remember it’s their problem, don’t make it yours!
‘We either make ourselves miserable,
or we make ourselves strong.
The amount of work is the same.’
What the mind can believe the mind can achieve